I don’t read much these days, it’s like my mind can’t concentrate that much. However, I still enjoy listening to books. Recently I played Dee Henderson’s “Danger in the Shadows” book again (yes I like listening more than once!) It’s about a daughter of a high-profile person, who was kidnapped at a very young age. A phrase caught my mind “she was rescued from the dark root cellar after 9 days to a beautiful sunrise from God”. To a beautiful sunrise from God resonated with me because I’ve been in my own darkness of late.
My darkest days are because this is my first Christmas and New Year’s as a widow. I’m missing making the meal together and entertaining extended family, or going to be with extended family. Missing him making me cry “in a good way”, something he loved to do by surprising me with a softly spoken compliment or special gift. Christmas Eve service was a tear jerker. I love songs about Christ’s sacrifice for us or about Heaven, but these days the tears start and just don’t stop.
I’ve lost many people in my life. I was very close to both of my Grandmother’s, my mom’s mom was more like a mother to me for various reason (we’ll leave that to another blog), she passed in 1993. I lost my dad in 1998, his dad in 2001 and his mom in 2005, and my mom in 2007. I don’t think I’ve ever thought about Heaven so much as I have because of losing my husband.
John 14:2-4 My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.
Just now as I typed I misspelled “place”. When I right clicked to correct it, Word gave me three choices with their definition. The first definition of place was “home”. Jesus went to prepare our HOME. One of my GriefShare sessions said that the Bible doesn’t say much about Heaven because we cannot begin to imagine how wonderful it is there, but I can imagine the most welcoming, warm, comfortable home I’ve ever known. When I realize Heaven is trillions more special than that, I can turn my darkness to joy over knowing that Rob is there.
I also know God holds me in His loving arms, as my Daddy, and as my husband now. Psalm 23:4 Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
How is God comforting you in your darkest valley?
Father, it’s easy to see you in the beauty, in the sunlight, in times of good and plenty, and in times of joy. Help us to feel You in the dark, in the valley, to rest in your arms and in your peace. Amen
Grace Under Pressure 