I loved Kaiser and the care they gave Rob. When I finally answered the 817 area code call that had been coming in on my phone daily, it was Kaiser asking to do a survey about the last month of my loved one’s life. If you read “It’s about to be 2018….” you know it’s been rough of late. I told the very young person on the other end of the line that I thought this was horrible. She asked if there was a better time she could call? “NO, this is an awful thing to be doing a survey on.” I don’t even remember what she said next as I took a deep breath and decide it would be good to “help”. Today, I wish I didn’t always want to help.
She read me the standard disclosure about how I could stop at any time, etc. I think I made it through most of the survey based on the length of time it was supposed to take. However, when they started asking very detailed questions about the very end it was more than I could take! In the moment of the heartache and tears, I said “and we are done, this is horrible, goodbye” , and I hung up without giving her time to speak. I sit back now and think, really, you need to know specifically if they did everything they could to keep him comfortable? If they didn’t, don’t you think I would raise H E double hockey sticks! (By the way Denver Hospice was beyond amazing in what they did for us.)
Now a little over an hour later when I can think straight, I do realize that not everyone is a “Mama Bear” when it comes to getting what their loved one needs in health care. One of the best things about Kaiser and specifically Kaiser Oncology, was the Oncologist saying to me “We will not abandon you.” Talk about a warm hug and feeling huge relief. We had been abandoned by two other Oncologist that deemed Rob was no longer their patient because he wasn’t doing traditional treatment. With reflection now, I wasn’t such a “Mama Bear” over that, that was wrong and shouldn’t have happened. It made my life as a caretaker very difficult. Kaiser was amazing and I hope to figure out a way to let them know that. I do wish I could save others from that survey.
Bottom line, I guess I just don’t understand why we have so many surveys. Maybe because we don’t let people and companies know when they do a good job, and all they get are the complaints? Or we are in such a litigious society that they want to do better and not get sued? I have no answer, just survey annoyance. Sorry…
Father, life is full of blindsides. I’m so grateful that you are there in good times, in bad times and in blindsides. I’m not even sure how these words can help someone today, except that with great love comes great grief. I thank you for that love and the blindsides that come in my grief. May they make me more aware of other peoples hurts and less likely to unintentionally hurt them, as well as more gracious towards those who unintentionally hurt me.
Grace Under Pressure 